Hien challenges us to explore the stereotypical Dom/sub picture with this lovely educational and autobiographical piece on Soft-Dom. Affection, Care, Communication – I love it all so much.

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Hien’s Blog Notes!
Thank you to my wonderful friend Chris not only for starring in this comic, but also for braving this brand-new world with me! Thank you to Nick and Jacob for your help with some photo references as well! And thank you to my editor Ziggy for helping me find the shape of this story that’s been ruminating in my head since last year! Finally, thank you all for reading! I hope you’ve learned something new, or if you end up finding the stricter depiction more appealing… well, that’s definitely not unintentional ;)

Finally, a huge thank you to all of you who’ve chipped in this past month. Truly. We’ll be diving in after we get out final numbers, and making plans and decisions accordingly. But each and every one of you who’ve signed up has meant the world to me and the team. I think these comics are important and apparently you do too, thank you.

– The Oh Joy Sex Toy per-comic Patreon to directly support these comics

– The Erika Moen Monthly Patreon with her many art projects

↓ Comic Transcript
Hien Pham lushly illustrates this comic in a somewhat realistic rendering and in red and purple hues.

Page 1
Hien and his companion sit on a bench against the wall of a sex dungeon. They are mostly nude, except for the towels over their laps, so their hairy chests and bellies are exposed. They also both wear glasses and have beards. Towels, sex tools, and informational posters hang on the wall, while a heavy duty chain hangs in the foreground, supporting some kind of sex support equipment. Also in the foreground is a couple. We can see one hairy chest and belly wearing an open vest (Dom), hand on the head of the partner (Sub) who is kneeling in front of them with an eye-mask on.

Narration: I've gotten to do a fair bit of Shibari recently, and in a surprising turn of events, I'm finding myself growing into somewhat of a Dom.
"Did I... do okay?" Hien asks his friend.
"You did great!" His friend says, pulling Hien in close for a side-hug.
"Yay!!" Smiles Hien.

Narration: Surprising because... I was never sure if I really fit into the stereotypical Dom/Sub image.

The friend loops his arm over Hien's shoulder as they continue to sit, while in the foreground we see the couple from the first panel again. We can now see that the kneeling, masked person also has a collar and leash around their neck, and the standing person a firm, gloved hand on the back of their head, holding them in place.

Narration: I never liked the feeling of being punished, or having to dish out punishment. Absolute "obedience" rubs me the wrong way. The power exchange seemed all to intense to take on.

We see the top left quadrant of Hien's companion's chest, showing off tracks of rope marks left on his skin.

Narration: Still, I wanted to be someone who could enable my partners' pleasure and desire, and that meant taking the reins in a way comfortable to me.


Page 2
Narration: When we talk about Domination, there's a prevalent image that comes to mind, right?

Image: Dom holds Sub's cheeks with one gloved hand while gently letting their drool pool into Sub's open mouth. Dom's heavy chain and padlock hang around their neck.

Narration: A Dom is given control by their Sub, and uses it to deal pleasure and pain in mutually agreed-upon measures. Your mind and body are utterly surrendered to someone who holds the key to your every desire in their hands. The fantasy is often driven further with titilating scenarios of desperation, humiliation and even degradation.

Image: Hien stands behind his companion, who is wearing a rope harness over their chest. Hien caresses his partner's shoulder and nuzzles into the person's back.

Narration: A soft approach to Domination offers the same pleasure, but with a focus on care, and affection. In place of punishments, there could be positive reinforcement making use of praise and reassurance throughout a scene. The full submission fantasy gives way to a more levelled power balance. Consent is repeatedly asked for, reaffirmed, and reiterated. All Dom/Sub dynamics require care and consent, but they're more central and immediately visible in a gentle approach.


Page 3
"I'm gunna fuck you and pass you around until you can't take even one more load." The Dom informs their sub, who is kneeling barefoot and ankle-cuff bound between the Dom's boots.
"Yes, sir. My hole is yours, sir..." The Sub replies, barely quivering.
"Good boy." Says the Dom.

"Want me to open the door?" Hien asks his standing rope-harnessed partner. "Or would you like to play a bit first?"
"Um... I haven't thought about it..." Replies his companion, a little timidly.
"That's alright!" Hien reassures him with a hand gently on this bound arm. "How about... we leave it open a crack while I warm you up with a flogger?

"This is MY dick, now." Growls the Dom as he aggressively jerks off the Sub. "Don't come, boy, or I'll lube up your ass with your own cum and fuck it AGAIN."
"Sir!! Please!! I... I-I'm gonna-" Grimaces the Sub.

"How are you feeling?" Hien asks, hand pausing between spanks on his companion's bent-over bottom. "Ten more and you'll get a kiss~"
"I'm good! Let's do fifteen and you slip some tongue in there?" Suggests the companion, thighs quivery lightly in their rope harness.
"Haha! If you moan loud enough!" Agrees Hien.


Page 4
Narration: To me, as a learning Dom, the gentler approach feels a lot less daunting. I still get that fulfilment from taking care of someone, but I don't have to make every single decision on my own.

Narration: One of my favourite things is presenting my partner a limited number of options to continue a scene.
Image: Hien offers a water bottle in one hand and a bundle of rope in the other.

Image: His companion drinks gratefully from the bottle that Hien holds for him.
Narration: I still take charge by picking out those choices, but by asking my partner to choose, I also get to let up on the reins.

Image: His companion rests his head in the crook between Hien's neck and shoulder, taking a moment to relax.
Narration: For a brief moment, I can take a breath, and my partner calms my mind by reaffirming what they want.

Narration: This approach feels almost collaborative in that way. Even though I have my hands on the controls, the scene is co-piloted by the both of us.
Image: Hien interlocks his fingers with his companion's, while their hands are bound behind their back in an elaborate rope harness.


Page 5
Image: Both sets of couples are now free-falling happily through the air.
Narration: A Dom/Sub power exchange is a nuanced, constant conversation and flexible sliding scale. In any given scene, the dichotomy of hard and soft go hand-in-hand and flow from one to another. Tenderness hits that much harder peppered with an otherwise intense series of events.

Over an illustration of a heavy chain, a rope, and a leather strap, the narration reads: A gentle hand can dish out just as much pain as a punishing one. An affectionate reassurance and a devilish demand can make you quiver just the same.

"My own approach to soft Domination is ever-evolving, and won't be the same as anyone else's!" Hien addresses the reader after his session with his companion has concluded. He wears the former rope harness looped loosely around his heck and chest while he affectionately hugs his companion, who sits between his legs. "Talk to your play partners and see how you feel! The most important thing is communication! After all, I might like my Dom soft, but only you can decide what your pleasure is made of!"

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Today's comic was drawn by Hien Pham who can be found on; https://hienpham.artstation.com/
It was then transcribed on Oh Joy Sex Toy by Erika Moen on 4/29/24
Enjoy our transcripts? Support the comic, so we can keep making them! https://www.patreon.com/OhJoySexToy